Thursday, April 1, 2010

Ratcatcher

I may now add ratcatcher to my career path, even though I have no small but vicious dog.

We have a clan of rats that like to use the the fence line between our house and the neighbor's as a highway. They have been at it since we moved in, a fact I carefully didn't make my wife aware of.

My daughter left some bird seed on the ground. The rats made a feast of it and left sign they'd been there. Then they were so foolish as to be spotted by both child and wife.

Thereafter I was told, in no uncertain terms, that the freeway was closed to rat-kind.

So last night I set the trap. Five minutes later, a little squeaker was breathing his last. Tonight I do it again. I foresee a lengthy battle with the general population of the little buggers. It's not the war I wanted to fight but it is the one I got, and the one I will win.

Rat-kind will soon be squirting the musk of fear at the very mention of my name.

It is a shame that they couldn't resist the bounty my daughter inadvertently left them. If they had, the I-Griffin through town would still be open to traffic, none of the rat-kin would have had to die, and I would not have become their nemesis, the Ratcatcher.

5 comments:

  1. "squirting the musk of fear"... Jesus.

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  2. Oh yes, and the rats shall know their nemesis, and his name is mine! Fear my coming, rats!

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  3. Just watch out for the skaven...

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  4. squeekity squeek squeek, squeekity squeek squeek, squeekity squeek squeek, squeek sq-squeeek

    ReplyDelete